One Eddy that deserves particular mention is the Eddy at the Second Cliff, the border trouble at the upper edge the official UUYAN age range. As Eddies go, it's a large, slow, and deep one. People might first feel its destabilizing pull at the age of 27, and remain caught in its slow deep twist for a decade or more. It seems to affect men more often then women, perhaps because the Cliff of difference between UU culture and the dominant culture is higher for males than for females. (UUYAN is a culture whose values are considered "feminine" by the dominant culture.)
In this Eddy, like others, the victim is being crushed and spun between two powerful opposing forces-- the inclusive unconditional love of the communion Pool, and the pressure of the spoken or unspoken demand that older young adults "age out" of, be stripped of their membership in, the Community.
If the person caught in this Eddy sees only a Cliff on the outside edge, then his only hope of escaping drowning in the vortex is to try and swim back toward the center of the Pool. But if he receives no new help or guidance at the center, he will only be pulled by the current outward again toward the terrible Eddy and the terrifying Cliff.
The UUYAN movement has tended to unwittingly collaborate in the stirring of this Eddy, responding to the victim's struggle by alternately pulling him toward a changeless center or pushing him violently toward the Second Cliff.
Confused and hurting, the people caught in this Eddy over the years continue to participate in the community and to serve it as best they can, often taking on volunteer roles at events, which helps to affirm their position and membership. But the spiritual twisting of the Eddy causes them to radiate varying levels of perceptible desperation, resentment, bitterness, aliennation, rage and fear, which, in turn, increases the outward pressure of the community's desire for them to "move on."
I want the Eddy replaced by a gentle ramp, a sloping beach, or at least a poolside ladder with clear firm steps that can be clung to and followed to safety. UUYAN needs to be a place where people can get the guidance they need to learn how to safely grow up. UUYAN should be about Bridging, about proudly claiming and developing adulthood, not about Bridging-Denial, not about pretending that we can hide in the Pool forever and nothing will ever change.